I’m too old now and soon I will die
But I was lovely once to men
And I could make them honour me
Exotic features turned them on.
My sons have left, which is the worst
And many husbands and divorces;
It is all over and all past
Thus near the end forgive me, Jesus.
I wasn’t one to go to church
But priests and doctors liked me still
They knew I nearly used a bridge
To kill myself, mentally ill.
So all my life, with benefits
And maintenance and holidays
I raised my boys on divorce suits
And state aid because sickness pays.
It was a man’s world, and they loved
An idle woman like I was.
In my day I was unreproved
If I was bad, forgive me please.
I’m lucid, I can see the truth
Though old and ugly and alone
As solitary as in youth
My one achievement was my son.
And I looked after him, so God
Look after me, just as I am
And when I die, flat out in bed
Please don’t avoid me, but take me home.
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